Part 1
Take pressure, or hold pressure. It’s different.
When there is pressure, it simply means that the limitation of oneself is lower than what they can take or hold. People generally feel pressure as an inside experience; however, pressure is initially an emotional feeling that happens in the relationship between oneself and the outside. It is internally generated once external evaluation is internalized.
Except for real pressure, which can be quantified and arises from survival needs, when something threatens one’s physical existence, there is also a more influential one, virtual pressure. A pressure that is situated in the mental, which is invisible but has a significant impact.
When there is pressure, there is a responsibility, an external evaluation, and an interest (benefit) to oneself. Therefore, when something aligns with one’s passion, even if it involves these three elements, due to the weight that is initially from within, it’s not called pressure; it’s called excitement.
Sometimes, both types exist simultaneously. It can be confusing to tell which originates from outside and which from within. If a person can’t carry such pressure, they will take it all and internalize it to change themselves. However, such a change happens suddenly, without inner strong support, then it will weigh them down, even crush them. However, if they can distinguish them and know themselves well, they can take a risk to believe in themselves by holding the pressure from outside to protect their inner excitement.
For people who are taking the pressure and such an outcome indeed benefits them, even though there is no passion, they can take the pressure as a motivation or support. In such a case, those people have learnt a methodology on how to fulfill things excellently when they don’t have inner pure passion. Short-termly, it can be regarded as a success; however, long-termly, the setbacks are floating slowly, simply because they are draining their fountainhead, they win the outside, but lose themselves.
Above all, they are talking about heavy and important pressure that will work for one’s life. There is another kind of pressure, one that is light, without responsibility, without external evaluation, and without interest, but solely about morality.
When there is a universal moral orientation, such pressure is about politeness. Taking pressure is a sacrifice; a sacrifice means a debt from the future to fulfill now. Holding pressure is hard, but protecting oneself for now and the future.
Overall, the best solution is holding pressure from outside to protect one’s inner order and belief. Acknowledge the limitations, holding the outside pressure by gaining more time to think about it clearly; meanwhile, for the responsibility consideration, importantly, be honest about everything. Because when there is genuine appreciation, things should be negotiable for a long-term, valuable outcome.
Sometimes, there is another common way to escape the pressure when things are out of one’s control. It’s absolutely no problem. However, don’t blame others for shifting the responsibility. That’s immoral.
Part 2
Dealing with pressure is one of the processes for managing the relationship between oneself and the outside world.
The key determination of the aftereffect on the result of holding pressure is situated in one’s morality and responsibility.
If holding the pressure is only to protect one’s autonomy, then it probably will have aftereffects that feel like another pressure. Then, such a holding is very exhausting. Exhaustion shouldn’t be the result.
Therefore, a clear boundary on responsibility is like a moat. The world is unfair; it is not a world that one deals with well, then everything will be fine. People naturally tend to transfer the pressure to others when they don’t want to do something, more clearly, transfer the responsibility. But the way of transferring will make one feel like pressure that they should take.
Therefore, holding the pressure from others, and being clear to yourself whether it’s your real responsibility for the whole. If not, just leave it alone and don’t internalize it. Save your time and save your energy.